Staff picks: Our biggest fears

October has come, a month where the season aesthetically (if not officially) changes from one of tank tops, beach balls, and sunglasses to one of colorful leaves, gourds, sweaters, and, most importantly, Halloween. At The Bark, we love Halloween, so for the rest of the month, our creepy, crawly, monstrous staff will be discussing some creepy, crawly, monstrous topics. To kick things off, here are some of the things that scare us the most.

My biggest fear is being afraid of things that I know in the end will more times than not turn out just fine. FDR was right when he said, “We have nothing to fear, but fear itself.” Fear has the power to cripple you mentally and feed lies into your head that cause you to be anxious and burden you with a heavy heart. I am not saying that fear itself is a bad thing because it can also hold you accountable for your actions, but one has to be careful to not get caught up in all of their little “fears”. [Litza Craig]

My biggest fear is definitely storms. Little, insignificant daytime storms don’t make me nervous. It’s the gut-wrenching, house-shaking kind of storms that send me on edge. The fact that a sound can be so loud that it shakes my entire home is terrifying, not to mention the bright flashes of lightning that illuminate my perfectly dark room, interrupting my sleep with their terrifying presence. I understand some people love storms, but that is not personally my cup of tea. [Zoey Line]

Honestly, I am afraid of quite a few things, but there is one fear that really stands out to me as the most frightening: the parabola (cue lightning flash and creepy music). You never know the true terror of a parabola until you create one on your calculator. Everything about it just seems to be absolutely weird and creepy to me. The parabola has been terrorizing mathematicians for a while now and is definitely gaining speed and now haunts students and teachers alike around the globe. There truly is nothing more scary than a parabola as it is a wonder to the math world. Next time you are in a haunted corn maze or something, a parabola may very well be lurking nearby. [Graham Benefiel]

Worms? No scarier than pasta. Spiders? Pretty used to them by now. But cicadas? No, I do not want your giant screaming sausage body in my face, thank you very much. And it only makes it worse that they leave little statues of themselves out of their own skin all over the place. To top it off, some species are “zombies,” coming out of the ground just to be as creepy as they possibly can. Cicadas do not belong in the natural world, or at least one where I can feel safe going outside in the summer. [Allie Gruszkiewicz]

Every scary movie I’ve ever seen has started with someone being stranded. They wander around helplessly until something terrible happens to them. Having to wait helplessly to die or be rescued without any hope of survival is the scariest thing I can imagine. This is mainly because I have no idea how to survive by myself in the wilderness. I’d rather be thrown into a pit of fire than end up stranded and alone. [Katie Matthews]

My biggest fear in the world is… you guessed it… no more Starbucks. I know some people would say that at least I wouldn’t be wasting my money, but I don’t think of it as a waste of money considering the simple joy I get from drinking my Starbucks. Also, if there was no more Starbucks, I would be walking around school with a headache all day, and I would be unpleasant to be around. Of course, the worst part of there being no more Starbucks is the fact I wouldn’t have a pumpkin spice latte to drink on my back porch on Sunday mornings. [Hannah McElroy]

The scariest things on earth are sharks. I firmly believe that it is undeniable. Those teeth, those beady little demon eyes – everything about them is horrible. It’s like they’re built to eat humans alive! There’s no possible other reason that sharks are that enormous. [Emily Price]

I really don’t know what my biggest fear is… I typically don’t think about things like that in my spare time. [Ed Dudrick]

Mental illness is the most terrifying phenomenon I can think of. Nothing is worse than your perception of reality being inaccurate. Nothing else induces such feelings as hopelessness, vulnerability, and weakness. Sanity is the most valuable thing we have. [Helen Law]

My biggest fear. Hmph. FIRE is one. Definitely being trapped in space. I mean I haven’t even seen Gravity yet. I have no idea what I would do. Probably just die of fright. [Taylor A. Johnson]

I’ll never know why clowns are thought of as funny; they’re actually terrifying. I’ve always been a little creeped out by clowns, and my fears were compounded when my Stephen King-loving friend gave me a detailed synopsis of It in the 6th grade. Further experiences include a night being followed around a haunted corn maze by a pair of ghostly clowns singing “Wheels on the Bus.” It’s not as funny as it sounds, okay? [Jack H. Evans]